“There’s a trick to the ‘graceful exit.’ It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, or a relationship is over–and let it go. It means leaving what’s over without denying its validity or its past importance to our lives. It involves a sense of future, a belief that every exit line is an entry, that we are moving up, rather than out.”

– Ellen Goodman

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As you set your goals for 2021, it’s important to do it in a way that also strengthens your personal resilience through the practice of celebrating endings. 2020 has been a tough year for so many – some, like us, have lost loved ones whilst others have even lost their livelihoods, the opportunity to travel and missed connecting with friends and family. And yet, the resilient believe that all that happens happens for their benefit, though it might not feel apparent at that moment. They exercise this faith by seeking out the blessings, opportunities and positive lessons that have arisen.

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Remember that what you focus on EXPANDS. Take time out to celebrate endings by reflecting on the following questions:

  • What’s been GREAT about 2020?
  • What’s come into your life that would not have been possible before?
  • What was a blessing, something could have turned out a whole lot worse and yet, turned out to be manageable and you in fact, grew stronger and better from the experience?
  • If you have to do it all over again, what would you do differently AND better?
  • What strategies worked that you can continue to use through every challenge that life throws up at you in future?
  • What have you learned about yourself? What new strengths did you uncover?
  • Who could you appreciate for being an invaluable support to you directly or indirectly?
  • Who did you support and make a difference to?

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Allow the answers to marinade by reflecting on “what’s GREAT about that?” for each positive that arises. It may take several goes but continue to do this until you experience tears of gratitude well up. This practice helps ensure that you when you look back at 2020, whilst the memories of events will never be lost, the primary emotion you will want to have is one of GRATITUDE, not fear, regret or resentment.

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.“By taking just a few extra seconds to stay with a positive experience – even the comfort in a single breath – you’ll help turn a passing mental state into lasting neural structure.”

– Rick Hanson, “Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm and Happiness”

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And from this foundation of gratitude, be the captain of your ship. Visualise and define what will make 2021 the most extraordinary year of your life. You have 31,536,000 seconds to appreciate this year. How can you make each of these count?

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When you set your goals, be sure to set it for each of the key areas that deserve attention and that creates balance in your life – family, your relationship with your special other, your physical vitality, finances, bucket list items, career, finances, social contribution and personal growth. Each of these areas is intertwined – energy and success in one positively fuels the others. Conversely, when one area is starved of attention, it starts to wither and that also has an adverse effect on the other areas.

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“Balance is not something you find. It’s something you create.”
– Jana Kingsford

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Wishing you all the most powerful, inspiring start to a new year full of possibilities and fulfillment. Remember, U ROCK!!!!!